Holy Shit Batman

Well you'd think giving up the breast would be enough noooooooooooooooooo chemo, radiation, cancer drugs. I made an appointment today to go pick out a wig. Never in a million years did I want to do this. But you know I'm going to have a killer wig, ahem wigs. Scarves and hats. I don't know how I'll handle a bald head. I don't think its because I'm vain, who wants to be bald. But its better then the alternative not having found the cancer and well. So I definitely will get a funky one to wear if I am ever in a funky mood again. Halloween will be here and I will get an orange one for the 31st.OK enough about the wigs and baldness. If anyone reading this gets cancer or an illness I'm telling you blogging is the way to go. It's like so healing so safe in a weird way can't explain it just do it.
My breast is sore if you're wondering, the scar is long, narrow, neatly done, healing well. It's very swollen twice the size of the healthy right. The swelling will go down and the left will be smaller then the other. Yeah....I have a tight band like a tensor around my chest pressing the boobs down so the breast doesn't feel like its under my chin. That was a little hard to deal with.
I cannot believe I actually had a choice between a lumpectomy or mastectomy. I mean the breast was full of bad stuff, hard to screen on the mammogram, the ultra sound picked up the tumour, and the pathology after discovered there were two and the second bigger. Lots of homework and questions to ask. I need to better educate myself all on of this. Then I will be an activist, I will fight for women's breast everywhere, I'll be big yeah that's it big I tell you (little James Cagney for you). Well the fight right now has to be me doing it for me then I'll think about saving the world. Yeah and after my trip to Spain and Portugal next fall. Oh how soon will I forget??
Never I tell you, never will I forget and that's not being funny. My cancer was caught in time and she had decided to spread she was looking for stuff to feed on . Women girls we all need to ask more questions. I'm learning not to listen to what others say about their friends , sisters, mothers who went through it , make it you're mission to log on and read, read, learn ,learn. talk to doctors. Talk with other women eventually but not before you see your specialists surgeons. My choice was the right choice, who knew they were going to find what they did, based on the diagnostic tools and services offered to me. I made the right decision. My Oncologist agreed with me. Speaking of this I'd say 32 year old petite dynamo, she was awesome. I heard her coming down the hall before I met her and just by the clip clop of her high heels I knew she was a woman on a mission. Naturally for the first 10 minutes I gave her one liners actually kept cracking her up. then when I calmed down and listened the tears poured no no not from her me!!!!just joshing again. Frank liked her and we brought my private nurse. I will never ever be left alone in a hospital without a hired nurse to care for me. The others may be great.I met and was taken care by some of the best. But if you read about my night after the surgery you would understand.
Well I'm tired now just wanted you to know what was on my mind.The first round of chemo will be Oct 13th, if you're allowed drop by I'll be there probably all day. Frank is bringing his guitar and is going to serenade the whole floor. He has a beautiful voice, he's a real crooner, does Elvis, Beatles, French Balads, Brad Johner, Colin Ray, he is a master picker and has played with alot of somethin somethins. He's my Heroe and my Saint right now. His words of wisdom, advice, his smiles. Never enables me to go to a dark place. OK tired of reading. I;m tired of blogging. Good night.